"i don’t need to write that down, i’ll rememb—"
THIS IS THE TYPE OF SHIT SCIENTISTS BE THINKING ABOUT AND LAUGHING THO
how did the telephone propose to his girlfriend?
he gave her a ring
The most comforting beauty advice I’ve ever been given. (via statexalchemist)
I said this to one of the girls at makeup college when she was complaining about them always being different and she looked at me as if I had changed her life
never forget that australias first ever winter olympics gold was won because the guy was coming dead last and everyone in front of him fell over
the only reason he was in the final was bc the same thing happened in the semis
and the only reason he was in the semis was bc one of the guys that came ahead of him in the quarters was disqualified
i’m not sure if he’s the luckiest skater alive or a skater that has the power to curse other competitors.
i’ve been laughing non stop for the past like 10 minutes
long-distance friendships are terrible because you can’t meet up with them whenever you want and hang out on any given day which is why when i’m president i’m relocating the entire human population into a 10,000,000 story skyscraper that also acts as a bridge from earth to the moon which comes with the added benefit of swinging the moon around like a fucking mace, god damn it’s gonna look so cool. what was i talking about
I wonder if anyone ever looks at me while I’m doing something and thinks I’m pretty. Because I do that all the time to people.
becoming older than 10 years old was the biggest mistake of my life